Chapter 10

Days turned into nights, and nights into days, yet Shehnaaz remained detached from life itself. Since that moment in the jungle, she felt as if something had snapped inside her, something irreparable. She couldn’t return to her old life; a crucial part of her felt missing. She often clutched her chest, trying to feel her heartbeat, but there was nothing. It was as if her heart, her essence, had abandoned her. Was it because of the kiss?

Maybe not. It was more about the emotions Sidharth had ignited within her that day, only to cruelly extinguish them. The vibrant colors of her life faded into dull shades of black and white, and a deep, aching hollow began to creep inside her. She felt an unbearable loneliness, a sense of incompleteness, as if only Sidharth could make her whole again.

As the sun dipped behind the mountains, Shehnaaz found herself wandering through the fields, near the tractor where Sidharth had once pacified her and made her sit on his lap. A fleeting smile touched her lips at the memory, but it vanished almost instantly as she realized she was lost in reminiscence.

Her life felt colorless, void of the warmth and vibrancy it once held. The emptiness inside her seemed to grow with each passing day, and the once-comforting routine now felt like an endless loop of despair.

mujhe kya ho gaya hai..? she murmured to herself, the words dripping with a sense of longing and hopelessness.

Sidharth’s presence was a constant, haunting echo in her mind. Every corner of the field reminded her of the times they shared, the laughter, the arguments, and the stolen moments of tenderness. The memory of him holding her close, his warmth, and the feeling of belonging brought a brief respite, but reality always crashed back in, leaving her more broken than before.

Shehnaaz’s nights were the hardest. Alone in her room, she would stare at the ceiling, her mind replaying every moment they had spent together. Her heart ached with a longing she couldn’t escape. The kiss had been a game changer, a moment where everything had changed. It wasn’t just the physical act; it was the emotions it stirred within her, the realization that Sidharth had become an inseparable part of her.

Shehnaaz felt like a ghost, drifting through her days without purpose. Her friends noticed the change in her, but she couldn’t bring herself to explain. How could she put into words the depth of her despair, the way Sidharth’s absence gnawed at her soul?

She walked through the field, the memories of Sidharth’s laughter, his touch, his words swirling around her like a relentless storm. She missed the way he used to make her feel alive, the way he filled her world with color. Now, everything seemed dull and lifeless.

Shehnaaz paused near the tractor, the spot where Sidharth had once pulled her onto his lap, his arms wrapped around her, his presence a comforting cocoon. A bittersweet smile formed on her lips as she recalled the joy of that moment, but it was quickly wiped away by the harsh reality of the present. She was left with nothing but memories and a hollow ache where her heart used to be.

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Sidharth felt like he was about to burst. The anger, frustration, and restlessness simmered inside him, and he desperately needed an outlet. It had been more than a week since he returned, yet he couldn’t settle back into his old life. Something fundamental had changed within him, leaving him feeling lost and empty. He despised the loneliness that now consumed him, the hollow existence of his lonely heart.

He couldn’t pinpoint strong feelings for Shehnaaz, not yet. But the fact that she regretted their kiss, that she didn’t like it, gnawed at him. It was a reality he couldn’t accept. Every time he saw Abhi lost in conversation with his Payal, he felt a pang of longing for his Naaz and their chats. It had been over a week since they last spoke, a stark contrast to their usual banter and constant messaging. He missed the way she would annoy him; he’d welcome that over this unbearable silence.

In his cabin, memories would flood back—like the time she brought him tiffin. He had enjoyed it so much, but then he’d remember how he made her cry, and he’d curse himself for it. Shehnaaz was his friend, his best friend, but even that didn’t seem enough anymore. He was confused, torn between their friendship and a deeper, unspoken longing. What did he really want from her?

The colors of happiness and satisfaction had drained from his life, leaving it dull and lifeless. He craved to fill that void, to rid himself of the suffocating loneliness. He wanted to talk to Shehnaaz, to hear her voice, to feel her presence. Even if she annoyed him, it would be better than this deafening silence.

Sidharth’s thoughts constantly circled back to her. He remembered the small gestures, the way she brought joy into his mundane routine. He couldn’t shake off the guilt of making her cry, of hurting his best friend. But beyond the guilt, there was a deeper yearning. He wanted more from their relationship, something he couldn’t yet define.

In moments of solitude, he found himself haunted by the memory of her bringing the tiffin, her smile lighting up his day. He remembered how he had snapped at her, her eyes welling up with tears, and he’d curse himself over and over again. She was his friend, his confidante, but it felt like it wasn’t enough. What more did he want from her? What was this nagging feeling inside him?

He longed for the days when their lives were filled with laughter and banter, when their conversations flowed effortlessly. The silence between them now was unbearable. He needed to hear her voice, to talk to her, even if it meant she would annoy him. Anything was better than this torturous quiet.

Sidharth knew he wanted the colors of happiness and satisfaction back in his life. He wanted to find a way out of this loneliness. And deep down, he knew that talking to Shehnaaz, hearing her voice, would be the first step towards that. He missed her terribly, and the void she left in his life was too much to bear.

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Both Shehnaaz and Sidharth lay on their respective beds, miles apart but sharing the same restless longing. Two weeks had passed, though it felt like an eternity to both of them. Life, which had once seemed simple, now felt overwhelmingly difficult. Shehnaaz clutched her cellphone tightly, willing it to ring, while Sidharth stared at his, motionless, silently hoping for a call. The truth that neither had the courage to make the first move was the most frustrating part.

Restless, Shehnaaz walked to her window and gazed at the moon, its soft glow offering a slight comfort. Shehnaaz stared at the same moon from his window, rolling on his bed. For a moment, they were both compelled to look at the moon, as if it held answers to their unspoken questions.

Shehnaaz smiled at the moon, then at herself. It was a mysterious smile, a mix of sadness and hope. She felt an emptiness within her, a hollow that she desperately wanted to fill. She pondered if she could love herself enough to fill that void or if someone else could do it for her. But if someone were to love her, she realized she would have to love them back. The thought made her smile again, a smile tinged with her own innocent musings.

Sidharth kept his gaze on the moon before looking at his empty arms. He remembered how Shehnaaz had clung to him when he kissed her. He longed for that warmth, that connection, in his life once more. He wanted love, true love, that brought warmth, happiness, and satisfaction. Though he tried to love himself, it never seemed enough. He yearned for someone to love him with all their heart, but who could that be?

The silence of the night enveloped them both, amplifying their thoughts and emotions. Shehnaaz, standing by her window, felt a strange kinship with the moon, as if it shared her loneliness. The moon’s serene light seemed to whisper to her, offering a gentle solace. She hugged herself, trying to imagine what it would feel like to be loved, to have someone who understood her completely. She wanted to feel whole, to be cherished. She smiled again, her thoughts drifting to Sidharth, wondering if he felt the same.

Sidharth’s mind was equally troubled. He stared at the moon, his thoughts a jumble of memories and desires. He remembered the feel of Shehnaaz in his arms, the way she fit perfectly against him. That kiss had ignited something within him, something he couldn’t easily dismiss. He wanted to feel that again, the warmth, the closeness. His empty arms felt like a glaring reminder of what was missing in his life.

He sighed deeply, his heart aching with the realization that he wanted Shehnaaz. He wanted her love, her presence, her everything. The moon seemed to cast a light on his deepest feelings, illuminating the truth he had been avoiding. He wanted love, not just any love, but a love that was real, profound, and life-changing. His thoughts kept circling back to Shehnaaz, and he wondered if she could be the one to fill the void in his heart.

The night wore on, and both Shehnaaz and Sidharth remained lost in their thoughts. The moon continued to shine, a silent witness to their inner turmoil. They both felt the weight of their emotions, the longing for something more, something real. The distance between them seemed insurmountable, yet their hearts beat in sync, connected by the invisible thread of love and longing.

As Shehnaaz finally lay down to sleep, she hugged her pillow, pretending it was Sidharth. She imagined his arms around her, the comfort and safety she would feel. She whispered to the night, her voice barely audible, “Sidharth…”

Meanwhile, Sidharth closed his eyes, trying to hold onto the image of Shehnaaz in his mind. He whispered to the darkness, “Naaz…”

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They stared at each other with all the love and longing they had been holding back for so long. The moment they had been yearning for had finally arrived, and their patience was rewarded. Shehnaaz ran towards Sidharth with all her might, and he did the same. As they met, Shehnaaz jumped into his embrace, holding him as if her life depended on it. Sidharth cocooned her in his arms, pressing her tightly against him, afraid to let go.

Their hearts, which had been aching with longing, finally found the satisfaction they had been craving. Shehnaaz’s arms snaked around Sidharth’s neck, pulling him closer, and Sidharth captured her lips with his own. This kiss was not gentle like their first one. It was filled with a inetntse emotions, a desperate need to convey just how much he had missed her.

He wanted her to understand the depth of his longing, the emptiness he had felt without her. 

Their kiss was restless, each trying to show the other just how much they had missed each other, how much they needed this moment.. It conveyed the depth of their feelings, the pain of their separation, and the joy of their reunion. It told them how much they craved each other, how much they needed each other, and ultimately, how much they loved each other.

The intensity of the kiss seemed to erase all the pain and loneliness they had felt. In each other’s arms, they found solace and completeness. The world around them faded away as they focused solely on each other, their love shining brighter than ever. It was as if their kiss bridged the gap between their hearts, filling the emptiness with warmth and love.

As they finally pulled apart, breathless and with their hearts racing, they looked into each other’s eyes. The unspoken words of love and longing were clear. They knew they had found something rare and precious in each other, a love that could withstand any challenge. And in that moment, they realized just how deeply they had fallen for one another, and how much they needed to cherish and nurture this love.

Their hearts, once burdened with pain and loneliness, now felt light and full. They held onto each other, knowing that this was where they belonged. Together, they had found their way back to happiness, and they were determined to never let go.

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Love??

Shehnaaz snapped open her eyes, her body drenched in sweat. The remnants of the dream clung to her mind, and the word “love” echoed in her thoughts. Suddenly, everything made sense—the restlessness, the pain, the emptiness.

Oh my God, she thought, her heart racing. I’ve fallen in love.

Shehnaaz couldn’t believe it. She had fallen crazily, deeply in love with her Shukla ji. The mere thought of it brought a magical smile to her lips. She smiled widely, feeling a burst of excitement course through her veins.

Oh my God, I’m in love, she repeated to herself, the words feeling surreal yet beautiful. She stood up on her bed, unable to contain her joy. I’m in love!

The realization made her feel like dancing right then and there. She had never felt so happy in her entire life. Her heart felt light and filled with a joy that was overwhelming. She wanted to rush to Sidharth, take him in her arms, kiss him, love him, and hide him from the world. The thought of being with him, of holding him close, made her heart flutter.

That’s why, she realized, her excitement bubbling over. That’s why I lied to my family and went to the jungle to make up with him. Because it mattered so much to me.

Shehnaaz’s heart was pounding as she sat back down on her bed. She grabbed her cell phone, ready to call him and confess everything. But then she remembered his fateful words.

“I am really sorry, Shehnaaz…”

Her smile faded, and a tear rolled down her cheek. The words echoed in her mind, bringing back the pain and sadness.

usne sorry kyu bola? she wondered, her heart aching. kya use mere liye kuch feel nahi huva..?

The thought was unbearable. She clutched her phone tightly, staring at the screen as if willing it to give her answers. Her heart was heavy with the realization that maybe, just maybe, Sidharth didn’t love her back. The happiness she had felt just moments ago was now replaced by a deep, aching sorrow.

Shehnaaz lay back on her bed, tears streaming down her face. The love she had discovered in her heart was now a source of pain. She closed her eyes, hoping that somehow, everything would work out.

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Love??

Why did he dream of her, and where did this word “love” come from? Could it be? No, no, how can that be… but then, this loneliness, this desperation, this emptiness…

What else could it mean? Why did his life seem lifeless without Shehnaaz? He couldn’t deny the fact that he was missing her badly. Her not calling him and her not liking his kiss were the main reasons behind his gloominess.

Could it mean… what? Oh my God, does he love Shehnaaz? What the… oh my God…

He had fallen crazily in love with his Dhanno?

Oh my God, oh my God… he thought, unable to believe himself. He had fallen for that disaster of a girl. A wide smile formed on his lips as he realized what he was missing. He was missing his heart, which wasn’t with him anymore. It was hers now.

Oh my God, I have fallen in love with my Naaz… he realized, feeling a rush of happiness. Now he understood why the news of Shehnaaz not being pregnant had given him so much joy. He was such a fool not to realize it before.

Oh my God, mujhe us pagal ladki se kaise pyar ho gaya, he thought, but then he mentally scolded himself for calling his love pagal.

Excited, he picked up his cell to call her, but then he remembered…

She had regretted their kiss. She was unhappy with the kiss. She had accepted his apology for the kiss and said…

“It’s ok, Sidharth… I am guilty too… let’s go…”

That’s what she had uttered emotionlessly. His smile turned into pain as the realization dawned upon him. She didn’t love him back.

Shehnaaz clutched the bed sheet in pain as the realization hit her. He had denied the moment; he had regretted it. This could only mean one thing…

He doesn’t love her…

The thought stabbed her heart ruthlessly, making it bleed furiously. Her muscles tensed as a sudden, desperate pain coursed through her senses. Unable to bear the pain, she broke into tears. The only man she had ever fallen in love with didn’t love her back. Sidharth doesn’t love her. The thought killed her a hundred times over.

Sidharth threw the cell on the bed as the realization struck him. She hadn’t even called him after that moment. She regretted the kiss. This meant… she doesn’t love him.

The thought drained every ounce of happiness from him. Pain welled up in his eyes as he closed them desperately. She had no feelings for him. The weirdest person he had ever fallen in love with didn’t love him back. He couldn’t bear that; it was heart-wrenching to accept. Maybe he wasn’t one of those lucky people who get their love.

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Hours passed, but the dark night didn’t seem to end. It rained furiously, reminding them of each other and the kiss they shared. That was the only memory they had of their love.

Sidharth walked on the terrace, lost in his pain, while the rain poured down violently on him.

Shehnaaz walked into the field, unable to bear the heartbreak, while the rain continued to pour heavily.

Both stood drenched in the pain of the furious rain and cried out for their fate.

WHY??

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Shehnaaz was sitting in her room, lost in her thoughts when Jasbeera ji walked in. “Shehnaaz beta, teri packing ho gayi hai na?”

“Packing?” Shehnaaz looked at her mother in confusion.

Jasbeera ji, who was rummaging through the closet, made a strange face at Shehnaaz. “Aise kya dekh rahi hai? Mene puchha, packing huyi ya nahi?”

Shehnaaz still failed to understand what her mother was asking. “Par, Amma, packing kis liye?”

Jasbeera ji stopped her searching session. “Shehnaaz, tu kaunsi duniya mein khoyi huyi hai? Do hafte se dekh rahi hun, tera bilkul dhyan nahi hai kisi chiz mein.”

Shehnaaz looked pale. “Amma woh…”

“Kya ‘Amma woh’?!” Jasbeera ji was evidently angry now. “Ek hafte se sab tayyariya chal rahi hai, tujhe kuchh pata bhi hai ya nahi?”

“Tayyariya?” Shehnaaz was definitely missing something.

Jasbeera ji made a super angry face and angrily called out for Payal. Payal hurriedly walked in, hearing her mother’s angry voice.

“Kya huva, Amma?”

Jasbeera ji made a disapproving face. “Mujhse mat puchh, apni behen ko samjha… mujhse puchh rahi hai kis chiz ki tayyariya chal rahi hai.”

Jasbeera ji frustratedly walked out, worried about all the arrangements for the wedding. Payal and Abhi’s marriage was just a month away, and here her daughter Shehnaaz was asking what tayyariya was going on. This was the limit.

Shehnaaz made a face at Payal while Payal rolled her eyes.

“Sana, kahan khoyi rehti hai? Shadi ki date fix ho gayi hai, it’s next month. Uski tayyariya chal rahi hai.”

“WHATT?”

Shehnaaz looked at her sister in astonishment. This was seriously the limit. How could she be so lost as to not realize such an important thing? She looked at her sister with a guilty look.

Payal smiled in return. “Main jaanti hoon tu kisi baat se pareshan hai, par tu batayegi nahi to main kaise samjhoongi?”

“Di, main…” Shehnaaz again went silent like every time. It had been two weeks since her sister was asking her the reason behind her gloominess, but Shehnaaz didn’t open her mouth.

Payal sighed. “Thik hai, main nahi puchh rahi hoon. Waise hum kal subah Mumbai ja rahe hain, shadi ki shopping karne. We will be there for a week. So, pack your things fast.”

With that, Payal walked out, leaving a shocked and super-shocked Shehnaaz behind.

Mumbai…???

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Author’s Note

Hello, dear readers!

I hope you enjoyed this emotional roller-coaster of a chapter. Watching Shehnaaz and Sidharth navigate their feelings has been a journey filled with highs and lows, and I’m thrilled to see their story unfold. Their pain, their love, and their moments of realization are all a part of what makes this tale so special.

Shehnaaz’s surprise about the wedding preparations and her realization of love were pivotal moments that I hope resonated with you as much as they did with me while writing. Sometimes, the path to understanding our own hearts can be the most challenging journey of all.

Thank you for your unwavering support and for being a part of this journey with me. Your comments, feedback, and votes mean the world to me and keep me inspired to write more. 

Stay tuned for more twists and turns as our characters continue to find their way through love and life. Until next time, keep your hearts open and your spirits high!

Also, stay tuned for Baarish,  Bhula Dunga, Mora Piya, Beintehaa and Thodasa pyar which will be starting soon along with the rest of the stories. There’s so much more in store, and I can’t wait for you to dive into these new adventures.

Don’t forget to follow me on  Wattpad, Instagram and Youtube  for updates, behind-the-scenes content, and more. Your support on these platforms helps keep the creativity flowing.

With love and gratitude,

Shalaka

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