Chapter 34

Sidharth woke up with a start, his heart pounding in his chest, and his breath catching in his throat. For a moment, he was disoriented, unsure if he was still caught in the haze of a dream or if what he was seeing was real. But then, his eyes landed on Shehnaaz, nestled beside him, her soft breaths brushing against his skin. She was in his arms, so close that their faces were only inches apart. He froze, not daring to believe what he was seeing.

A flicker of hope sparked deep inside him..

“Naaz…” he whispered, his voice barely audible, filled with an emotion so raw that it made Shehnaaz’s heart skip a beat. It was as if he had called out to her from the deepest part of his soul, a name spoken with tenderness and longing.

Shehnaaz, mesmerized by the thick emotions in his voice, felt her breath hitch. The way he said her name, so softly, so intimately, made her feel like nothing else mattered. There was something in his tone, in the way he looked at her, that tugged at her heartstrings. For a moment, it was as if time stood still.

Without warning, Sidharth, restless yet relieved, made a swift movement, pulling her beneath him. Shehnaaz gasped, completely taken aback by the suddenness of his action. Their eyes locked, and for a long moment, neither of them moved. They stared at each other, both breathing heavily, their faces inches apart. It was as if they had been separated for an eternity and were finally seeing each other after ages. The intensity between them was almost overwhelming.

“Tum kaha chali gayi thi…” Sidharth’s voice was laced with frustration, but beneath that, there was a mixture of hope, relief, and even a hint of accusation. His eyes searched hers as if they were looking for answers, looking for reassurance. He was angry, but he was also so desperately relieved to have her back. Shehnaaz’s eyes, on the other hand, were filled with concern and tenderness, reflecting the depth of her care for him.

For a moment, he couldn’t tell if this was real or just another dream. He had missed her so much, needed her so much, that he could no longer distinguish between reality and fantasy. All he knew was that in this moment, she was with him, and that was all that mattered. But he had no idea how to react. Should he be angry with her for leaving? Should he hold her close and never let go? The confusion swirled in his mind, mixing with the overpowering emotions.

His gaze turned darker, filled with the frustration that had been brewing inside him. He was angry—angry that she had left him, angry that she didn’t understand him the way he wanted her to. But more than anything, he was angry because despite all the walls he had built around himself, despite the hatred he tried to convince himself of, he still needed her. He needed her in a way that terrified him.

“Main yahi hun… kahin nahi jaungi…” Shehnaaz whispered softly, her voice steady but filled with emotion. She was lost in his eyes, the intensity of the moment making her forget everything else. She didn’t even notice that she was trapped beneath him, his strong arms caging her in. All she felt was the overwhelming need to reassure him, to let him know that she wasn’t going anywhere, no matter what happened.

Those simple words seemed to break something inside him. It was as if her promise melted away the anger that had been consuming him. Slowly, Sidharth’s fingers began tracing the outline of her skin, as if he was trying to memorize every inch of her, trying to commit her presence to memory. His touch was gentle, yet it sent shivers down her spine, a silent connection that spoke louder than words ever could.

As she lay there, her eyes wandered over his face, and her heart ached at what she saw. His eyes were heavy, dark circles etched beneath them, evidence of the sleepless nights he had endured. His face was pale, his skin clammy from the fever that had taken hold of him. He looked exhausted, worn down, as if the weight of the world had been resting on his shoulders. The sight of him in such a fragile state broke her heart into a million pieces.

Shehnaaz didn’t realize what came over her, but instinctively, her hand reached out to Sidharth’s forehead. Her palm pressed gently against his skin, checking for any trace of the high fever he had been battling. Her touch was light, almost hesitant, as if afraid of what she might find. Then, without thinking, her hand moved to cup his cheek, her thumb caressing his skin tenderly. The gesture was so soft, so filled with care, that it caught Sidharth completely off guard. He felt like he was falling under her spell, unable to break free from the warmth and tenderness she offered.

A wave of relief washed over her as she realized his fever had reduced, though his forehead was still warm. The worst had passed, but her worry remained.

“Aap ko achanak se fever kaise aa gaya..?” she asked softly, her voice gentle but tinged with concern. Sidharth couldn’t help but get lost in her eyes, which shimmered with worry. The sight of her furrowed brow and the genuine ache on her face made his heart squeeze. She looked so concerned, as if his pain was her own.

“Kal tak toh aap bilkul thik the.. aap kahi baarish mein toh nahi bhige na?” she mumbled, her voice a little rushed as her worry bubbled over. Her words felt like a soothing balm, even though her concern was misplaced. Sidharth could do nothing but shake his head, silently denying her question. But in his heart, he felt something deeper—her care for him, her presence, her warmth. It all seemed to wrap around him like a comforting blanket, making him feel more at peace than he had in a long time.

All he could focus on was how much he loved the feel of her in his arms. The way her warm body fit perfectly against him, the sound of her soft voice wrapping around him like a melody. Her innocent eyes, wide with concern, held him captive. It was as if the world around them faded away, leaving only the two of them in that moment. Nothing else mattered.

Shehnaaz, lost in her thoughts, didn’t even realize she was speaking out loud. “Agar baarish mein bhi nahi bhige toh fir achanak se fever kaise aa gaya…” Her voice trailed off, but her mind was still racing, filled with worry. She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn’t notice how her words were spilling out. To her, she was just trying to make sense of what had happened, trying to understand why he had fallen ill so suddenly.

Sidharth, on the other hand, was entirely focused on her voice. The soft texture of it, the way it rose and fell, made him feel like he was floating. Without thinking, his face instinctively nuzzled against her skin, his nose brushing the delicate spot near her neck. She flinched slightly at the sensation, a light tickle spreading through her, but her fingers continued their path, pushing back the soft strands of his hair from his forehead. The simple touch sent Sidharth into a daze, his mind swirling with the feel of her fingers, the warmth of her presence. She didn’t even realize that she was brushing his hair.

“Inki aankhein bhi kaisi ho gayi hai.. pata nahi raat ko soye bhi ke nahi thik se…” She kept on blabbering softly, her voice trailing off into sadness as she added, “Mujhe bhi raat bhar neend kaha ayi…” Her voice broke slightly at the end, and Sidharth, despite his fever and the overwhelming exhaustion weighing him down, felt her words hit him straight in the heart.

Her confession—how she hadn’t slept all night either—struck a chord deep within him. His arms instinctively tightened around her, pulling her even closer. The sensation of her so close to him was intoxicating. Without realizing it, his lips brushed against the spot where his nose had been moments before, causing Shehnaaz to stop in her tracks. Her breath hitched, her heart racing as she felt the faint touch of his lips against her skin.

Her mind spun, trying to make sense of what was happening. She should have tried to regain some sense of control, but she couldn’t. She didn’t want to. Being in his arms, feeling his warmth, hearing the soft hum of his breathing—it felt right, like this was where she was supposed to be.

Sidharth, too, was lost in the moment, his exhaustion mixing with the emotions he couldn’t contain any longer. He didn’t want to think. He didn’t want to over-analyze or question what was happening between them. Instead, he just let himself feel. He rested his head on her chest, his ear pressed against her heartbeat. The steady rhythm of it soothed him in a way nothing else could. It was as if the sound of her heart beating calmed his own, the chaos inside him finally settling as he let himself be vulnerable with her.

Shehnaaz’s hand instinctively came up to cradle his head, her fingers tangling in his hair as he lay there, holding her like she was his only hope in the storm. Her heart raced, but at the same time, a deep sense of peace settled over her. She didn’t know what this moment meant, didn’t know where they stood or what the future held, but in that moment, it didn’t matter. All that mattered was that they were together, holding onto each other like they were the only two people in the world.

And maybe, just for that moment, they were.

Sidharth lay there, holding Shehnaaz close, as if his entire existence hinged on this very moment. What had she done to him? How had she become so essential to his life that the thought of being away from her for even a day felt unbearable? His mind, clouded by exhaustion and fever, kept circling back to the same question—what kind of magic had this woman cast over him?

Shehnaaz was still thinking..

Maybe it was the lack of sleep, the overwhelming stress, or the weight of unspoken emotions, but whatever it was had driven his body to the point of exhaustion. That must be why his temperature had spiked. Then a sudden realization hit Shehnaaz. Oh no, maa ne kaha tha inhone dinner nahi kiya.. inhe bhook lagi hogi. Her heart clenched at the thought of him being unwell because of his negligence. She tried to shift slightly, wanting to slip out of his arms and fetch him something to eat. But the second she made even the smallest movement, his grip tightened around her waist, holding her firmly in place.

“Don’t go…” he mumbled in his rough, tired voice. His words, barely audible, were full of need and vulnerability. The possessive way he clung to her made something deep inside him stir, a strange mix of satisfaction and relief washing over him. For the first time in what felt like forever, he felt at peace, like he was finally at home.

Shehnaaz, feeling the weight of his exhaustion and the tenderness in his voice, couldn’t bring herself to pull away. Her hand continued to glide through his hair, gently brushing it back while the other instinctively circled around his neck. Her heart melted at the way he held her, like he didn’t want to lose her, like he needed her more than he’d ever admit. “Mein kahin nahi ja rahi…” she whispered softly, her voice barely above a murmur, reassuring him with every gentle stroke of her fingers. A warmth spread through her chest, knowing he wanted her by his side, that he wasn’t ready to let go of her.

In that moment, Shehnaaz felt an overwhelming urge to hold him close, to shield him from the world, to protect him in the same way he always tried to protect her. She wanted to hug him tight, to bury this man, with all his complexities, deep within her embrace. “Aapne dinner nahi kiya hai.. me kuch khane ke liye lekar aati hoon aapke liye,” she added softly, her heart aching at the thought of him being hungry. She was ready to care for him, to do anything to ease his discomfort.

But then, just as quickly as that tender moment had blossomed, reality came crashing down on her like a wave of cold water. The soft smile that had been hovering on her lips vanished in an instant. Her fingers, which had been tenderly brushing through his hair, froze. Her heart skipped a beat as her mind registered what was happening.

Her hands, which had been so naturally wrapped around him, recoiled. Her eyes widened in shock, as if suddenly waking up from a dream. What in the world was she doing?

Oh God, what just happened?

Did she just scold him? Did she seriously just tell him off for not taking care of himself? And why on earth was she in his arms while he was awake? Her mind raced with a thousand questions, each more overwhelming than the last. Did he really rest his head on her chest? The intimacy of that simple act suddenly dawned on her, and she could hardly believe it.

Was this all just because of the fever? Was he feeling light-headed from the medicine, not fully aware of his actions? His body was still warm, his fever not completely gone. That must be it, she convinced herself, desperately trying to make sense of the situation. There was no way Sidharth, in his right mind, would allow her to be this close. Not when he had made it clear how much he resented her, how much he despised her presence.

Her heart pounded in her chest, as confusion and disbelief overwhelmed her. She tried to rationalize it all, telling herself that this moment was nothing but a consequence of his fever. Yes, that had to be it, she thought. He wasn’t thinking clearly. He didn’t know what he was doing. He would never let her get this close otherwise.

But even as she told herself that, a small part of her didn’t want to believe it. A small part of her wanted to hold on to this moment, to pretend, even if just for a little while, that he needed her. That he wanted her as much as she wanted him.

Yet, deep down, she knew this couldn’t be real.

Shehnaaz’s cheeks flushed deeply, her entire body warming as she felt the weight of Sidharth’s heavy body pressing against hers. His warmth, the way he carelessly lay on top of her, made her feel every inch of him. His hard frame was overwhelming, completely crushing her delicate form beneath him, but in a way that made her feel oddly comforted.

Ever since he had started hugging her to sleep, she had slowly grown used to the sensation of his skin against hers. Yet every time, it sent shivers down her spine, like she was experiencing something new all over again.

But this is how a husband and wife are supposed to be, right? she thought to herself. Skin to skin, tangled in each other, becoming whole, becoming one. It was the way she imagined intimacy—the closeness, the warmth, the shared breaths. It made her feel connected to him in a way words never could.

Sidharth groaned softly, his body shifting restlessly as he realized her fingers had stopped running through his hair. It was something that had been soothing him, grounding him in this tender moment. Lifting his head just slightly, he looked at her, his gaze landing on her wide, scared eyes. “Kya hua?” he asked, his voice rough, edged with sleep.

She looked like a frightened mouse, her fear palpable in her silence. Her throat felt dry, and she struggled to find her voice. Clearing it with a soft cough, she stammered, “Kk… kuchh… kuchh nahi…” She could hardly process her own thoughts, completely out of her depth, feeling overwhelmed by the intimacy of the moment.

Without a word, Sidharth took her hand and placed it back in his hair, silently urging her to continue brushing through the messy strands. It was a simple gesture, but it carried so much unspoken vulnerability. His head rested back on her chest, as if that was the only place he found peace.

A soft blush crept across Shehnaaz’s lips as she resumed stroking his hair. She knew he wasn’t entirely in his senses, that the fever was making him drowsy, but still, she couldn’t help but cherish the moment. Her tiny, miny happiness, as she called it to herself, something so simple yet so precious. It was a rare moment where he needed her, where he was letting her in, and she didn’t want it to end.

“Aapne sach mein medicine li thi?” she asked softly, her voice gentle and cautious, hoping he wouldn’t get upset and pull away from her.

“Hmm…” he mumbled, his body still restless, shifting as if trying to get even closer to her. His arms tightened around her as though he couldn’t stand the distance, even though there was none. The way he held her made her feel like he was clinging to her not just physically, but emotionally as well.

Shehnaaz’s heart warmed at the thought of him seeking comfort in her. Trying to ease his mind further, she softly added, “Vihaan Sanju ke ghar pe hai… woh so gaya tha, aur aapko fever hai… ese mein use yaha lana sahi nahi laga mujhe…” She knew he would be worried about their son, even in this state. “Sanju aur Anu hai uske paas,” she reassured him gently. She hoped this would ease any worry he might have about Vihaan’s safety.

“Hmm…” he murmured again, this time softer, exhaustion clearly overtaking him. But there was a sense of peace in his voice, as though he trusted her completely. He somehow knew that Vihaan was safe with her around. He somehow knew that she would never let anything happen to their son. He somehow knew that this woman—his Naaz—was going to protect them both, no matter what.

Shehnaaz sighed softly, glancing at Sidharth as he lay there, silent and drained. She knew he hadn’t eaten dinner yet, and the thought of him going hungry tugged at her heart. She hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to bring it up without triggering his irritation. “Umm… woh… aap kuch kha lijiye,” she said quietly, her voice filled with caution, bracing herself for any outburst. Her fingers gently stroked the back of his neck, feeling the tension ease slightly under her touch as he let out a contented sigh.

Slowly, Sidharth lifted his head, responding to the soft caress. Their faces were so close, just inches apart, and for a brief moment, his eyes searched hers. “I don’t feel like it,” he murmured, his voice heavy with exhaustion.

Shehnaaz bit her lip, her worry deepening. “Please… main bas thoda sa kuch lekar aati hoon,” she requested, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. She could see how tired and hungry he was, and it pained her to see him like this.

Sidharth, lost in the sincerity of her teary eyes, raised his hand and gently brushed the back of his knuckles against her cheek, trying to soothe her. “Okay,” he agreed softly, unable to resist the plea in her voice.

A small, relieved smile appeared on Shehnaaz’s face, her heart fluttering. She quickly tried to get up, but Sidharth didn’t move, making her feel his presence even more intensely. She blushed deeply, her cheeks heating up as she turned her face away from him, not wanting him to see the effect he had on her. Somehow, she managed to slip out of bed, her movements brushing against him in the process, her pulse racing at the contact.

Shehnaaz returned in no time, carrying a plate of daal and rice, along with a glass of water. She had chosen simple, knowing he wouldn’t be able to handle spicy food in his current state. As she approached the bed, she sighed again, watching him rest against the pillow, his eyes closed, his hand instinctively reaching out as if searching for her presence beside him.

Quietly, she sat next to him, catching his attention. The moment she settled down, his hand found hers, holding it firmly. Her heartbeat quickened, and she instinctively tried to pull back, afraid that he might get upset with her closeness. But Sidharth didn’t let go. Instead, he sat up, still holding her hand, pulling her closer as if seeking comfort in her touch.

He made no move to take the plate from her or feed himself, his exhaustion evident. Shehnaaz, sensing his fragility, let him hold her hand. Her heart ached with the need to care for him, so she picked up a spoonful of daal and rice and carefully brought it to his lips. In that moment, she didn’t care about boundaries or the possibility of him getting angry. All that mattered was that he ate something.

To her relief, Sidharth accepted the food from her hand without a word, his grip on her other hand tightening slightly, as if grounding himself in her presence. Each bite she fed him seemed to ease a bit of the tension he carried, and with every spoonful, her heart swelled with a quiet sense of fulfillment. She watched him, hoping that the simple meal would bring him some comfort, and despite her nervousness, she felt a small surge of warmth seeing him trust her like this.

She kept feeding him, every small gesture between them filled with unspoken emotions. And in that quiet, tender moment, Shehnaaz realized just how much she wanted to take care of him, to be the person he could rely on, even if he wouldn’t admit it.

Sidharth silently ate a few more bites before looking at Shehnaaz, his voice low, “Bas…”

Shehnaaz stopped, nodding softly, grateful that he had at least eaten something. Setting the plate aside, she picked up the glass of water, offering it to him, but in her nervousness, she accidentally spilled some on his t-shirt.

“Yeh kya ho gaya…” she mumbled, her voice filled with worry. He already had a fever, and now wet t-shirt could make it worse. “Main dusri t-shirt lati hoon,” she said quickly, already moving toward the cupboard before he could protest.

“It’s okay…” Sidharth tried to mumble, but his words were slurred, his head heavy with pain. He had taken two tablets instead of one, and now drowsiness was overtaking him. Shehnaaz returned with a fresh t-shirt in hand, offering it to him, but he just stared at her..

She couldn’t leave him in a wet t-shirt, but her fear of his temper lingered in the back of her mind. Taking a deep breath, Shehnaaz decided to take a chance. Her hands trembled as she reached for the hem of his damp t-shirt, lifting it gently. Sidharth didn’t protest, his body too tired to react.

As she pulled the fabric over his chest, her eyes widened in awe. Bit by bit, his muscular torso came into view. She had seen him shirtless before, but never this close, and certainly not like this. His body was so well-defined, so muscled that she felt knots tighten in her stomach, butterflies fluttering wildly as her mind momentarily blanked out.

She licked her lips nervously, completely absorbed in the sight of him. Her subtle gesture didn’t go unnoticed by Sidharth, whose eyes flickered with a possessive stare as he watched her. His gaze locked on her lips, though he remained silent.

With shaky hands, Shehnaaz picked up the clean t-shirt and, though fumbling, managed to dress him without much grace. But Sidharth didn’t complain—he didn’t seem to care. It was as if he had given her the unspoken right to do whatever she wanted with him.

Once he was dressed, Shehnaaz gently helped him settle back down on the bed, her touch tender. She pulled the duvet over him, tucking him in carefully. His feverish body needed warmth, and she couldn’t help but feel a strong urge to protect and care for him.

As Shehnaaz turned to leave and change, Sidharth’s hand suddenly grabbed hers, pulling her back with surprising strength. She fell onto him, her heart racing as his arm wrapped around her possessively, drawing her into his warmth beneath the duvet.

“Ab kahan ja rahi ho…” he asked, his voice rough and needy, as if the thought of her leaving again was unbearable.

She stared at him, her eyes wide with surprise. He held her so tightly, as if he feared she might disappear. His arm remained firm around her, keeping her close, pulling her fully into his embrace. She shook her head softly, as if to reassure him she wasn’t going anywhere—not now, not ever. Though she knew he wasn’t fully aware of his actions, her heart couldn’t help but hope that maybe, just maybe, he meant it.

Without saying anything, Sidharth shifted, burying his face against her chest, seeking comfort. He guided her arms around his neck, silently urging her to hold him. She complied, her hands finding their way back to his hair, brushing through the messy strands once again.

“Kahi nahi jaungi… kabhi nahi jaungi,” she whispered softly, promising with every ounce of her being. She wasn’t sure if he’d remember this moment when his fever broke, but she hoped her words would reach his heart someday.

And with those words,  something in Sidharth seemed to snap. His breath came out in a restless groan as he moved without warning. Before she could fully comprehend what was happening, his lips crashed onto hers, searing and urgent, as if he had been holding back for far too long.

Shehnaaz froze, her entire body going still. Her mind went blank. All she could focus on was the feel of his lips—firm and intense, pressing against hers with a passion that took her breath away.

Was this a dream? It had to be. Never in her wildest fantasies had she imagined this moment, never had she dared to hope that Sidharth would kiss her one day. Yet here she was, living her most secret wish, one she had buried deep within her heart.

Her skin shuddered under his touch, and slowly, her lips began to melt into his. The world seemed to blur as all she could feel was the heat of him, the softness of his lips that contrasted with his strong, masculine presence. It was the most incredible, surreal moment of her life, and she wished it would never end.

Sidharth’s kiss was everything—intense, consuming, and raw. For the first time, she felt truly connected to him, as if all the barriers between them had crumbled away, leaving nothing but the two of them, tangled in each other’s warmth.

Shehnaaz was trembling beneath him, every nerve in her body alive as he kissed her with an intense need. It was as if he was starving for her, and in that moment, she felt completely his. Each brush of his lips sent a wave of warmth through her, making her heart race with a mixture of excitement and nervousness.

His lips moved against hers with a hunger that was undeniable, and she felt herself responding in kind, eager to match his passion. Sidharth groaned softly, a sound of pure satisfaction that made her heart swell. There was something magical about this connection, something that felt both new and familiar, like coming home after a long journey.

As the kiss deepened, Sidharth pulled her closer, rolling their bodies on the bed till he was beneath her, but in a heartbeat, he shifted, and she found herself back underneath him, exactly where she felt she belonged. It was a moment of vulnerability, but also of trust.

His touch sent shivers down her spine, awakening feelings she hadn’t fully understood before. She had been kissed before, by Arjun, but those had been meaningless couple kisses, sweet pecks but fleeting. This was different. This was not just a kiss; it was a connection that went far beyond the physical.

Her heart raced as she realized that this kiss was laced with emotions—his need, her submission, and an overwhelming sense of care. It was a kiss that spoke of worries and hopes, of dreams that could blossom between them. In that moment, they were claiming each other in a way that was profound, intimate, and beautiful. They were exploring not just each other’s lips but the very essence of who they were.

Shehnaaz couldn’t have imagined a kiss could feel so sweet, so passionate, and so utterly intoxicating. It was a moment she knew she would carry with her forever—the taste of his lips, the warmth of his breath, and the way he made her feel completely alive. This was her first chance to truly experience something so raw and powerful, and she was determined to savor every second of it.

With all the love she felt for him pouring out, she kissed him back with equal fervor. She let him take the lead, her fingers threading through his hair as she lost herself in the moment. One hand gripped his neck tightly, anchoring her as his kiss became more urgent, more consuming.

He was skilled, a master at the art of kissing, and she felt breathless beneath him, caught in the whirlwind of emotions that surged between them. This wasn’t just a kiss; it was an exploration of their souls, an acknowledgment of their feelings for each other. In that instant, nothing else mattered—only the two of them, wrapped in each other’s embrace, their hearts beating as one.

She had to break away from the kiss, her lungs screaming for air. The moment her lips left his, a pang of frustration shot through her. Sidharth groaned in restlessness, clearly not ready to let go. But before she could fully process it, he turned his attention to her earlobe, possessively nibbling at it, which sent shivers down her spine and a soft moan escaping her lips.

As his mouth roamed along her neck, time seemed to stand still. She was lost in the sensations, the warmth of his breath against her skin, and the way his fingers dug into her waist—so firm that she knew they would leave behind faint marks, a reminder of this moment. It felt like minutes—or maybe hours—as she surrendered to the wave of pleasure coursing through her.

Sidharth’s breaths grew heavier, and the weight of his body felt both comforting and overwhelming. She could sense the moment he began to drift off to sleep; his teeth stopped their gentle teething of her skin, and a peaceful stillness settled over him.

With a soft push, she tried to ease him onto the bed, wanting to make him comfortable. However, his arms instinctively tightened around her, pulling her back into his embrace. The blush crept across her cheeks, and a smile broke through her initial surprise.

Cuddling closer, she wrapped her arms around him, holding on as if her very life depended on it. In that warm cocoon, she felt a sense of safety and peace wash over her. Gradually, the heaviness of sleep began to take hold of her, lulling her into a serene slumber, all while nestled in the warmth of his arms. It was a moment she wished would last forever.

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