Chapter 28
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“Sidharth, answer me… Are you in love with Shehnaaz?” Simran asked again, her eyes fixed on him, searching for a response. He remained motionless, trapped in a whirlwind of thoughts.
Sidharth felt as if he were drowning in confusion. The very idea of love intertwined with Shehnaaz was utterly absurd to him. She was his baby, his little firecracker.. How could he even entertain such thoughts? Yet, despite his logical reasoning, he struggled to articulate the words that lingered in his mind. She was not just a friend; she was his best friend. But why couldn’t he say it? His heart thudded wildly in his chest as Simran’s probing question sank deeper into his consciousness.
“Do you love Shehnaaz?” Simran pressed on, her voice firm, trying to cut through the fog surrounding him.
“What rubbish are you talking about, Simran? Have you lost it? How can I love Shehnaaz? She’s just a baby for God’s sake! And she is my best…” he trailed off, the last word hanging uncomfortably in the air.
Simran snapped back, her frustration evident. “She is not a baby! And she is what… hmm, what? Just your best friend? Is that all she is to you?”
Sidharth ran his fingers through his hair in exasperation, feeling the heat of frustration rising within him. God, he was grappling with his feelings, trying to unravel the tangled mess of emotions swirling in his mind, and here she was, throwing more questions at him. He groaned, his mind racing back to that kiss he shared with Shehnaaz. It had been far from innocent; it was intense, electric, and filled with unspoken desires. He couldn’t just brush that aside.
Simran wasn’t about to give up easily. “Answer me, Sidharth! Is she just your best friend? Are you sure about that?”
“Yes! I know…” he muttered, frustration lacing his voice, desperate to escape her relentless inquiries.
“Fine then…” Simran huffed, feeling as if she were talking to a brick wall. The stubborn Sidharth Shukla would never accept the truth easily. But if he was going to play hardball, then she had a surprise up her sleeve. Here’s a little shock treatment for you.
A smirk danced across her lips as she revealed, “Sameer is coming…”
Sidharth felt an immediate surge of anger at the mention of Sameer’s name. “Why?” he snapped, his blood boiling at the thought of that guy.
Simran feigned nonchalance, raising an eyebrow. “Of course, for dinner, Sidharth… He’s coming along with Shehnaaz.”
The fury surged through Sidharth, and he could feel his fingers clenching into fists, the urge to punch something, anything, taking over. “Why can’t he just stay away from my Sana..?” he thought, his heart racing. The notion of Sameer being anywhere near her ignited a fierce protectiveness within him that he couldn’t ignore.
As he wrestled with his feelings, he realized this was more than just anger; it was something deeper. Sidharth was scared, scared of losing the one person who meant the world to him, scared that the lines between friendship and love were blurring, and terrified of what that could mean for their future. The conflict swirled within him like a storm, and he knew he had to confront it—before it was too late.
“Your Shehnaaz?” Simran teased, her tone light yet pointed. “She is not your Shehnaaz, Sidharth. She is just your best friend. Her name will be tagged to the person she will love and marry…”
Sidharth felt a chill run down his spine at her words. The very thought of Shehnaaz belonging to someone else twisted like a knife in his gut, igniting a storm of emotions within him. Ever since he had discovered Shehnaaz’s affection for Sameer, things had taken a turn for the worse. He had never realized how much this bothered him until now.
Nothing seemed to be going right for him. He felt lost, confused, and consumed by a growing hatred for Sameer that he didn’t fully understand. “Ugh, I just hate him,” he thought, frustration bubbling up inside him.
“And that person is Sameer, so Shehnaaz is Sameer’s claim,” Simran added, knowing exactly how to provoke him.
“Shut up, Simran! Just leave me alone!” Sidharth snapped angrily, unable to hide the rising tide of his emotions. He hated hearing those words. She couldn’t belong to someone else; the thought was unbearable.
“I’m not done yet, Sidharth,” Simran retorted, her anger matching his.
Sidharth walked to the edge of the terrace, the cool night air hitting him as he dug his fingers into the cement structure, his frustration pouring out through the pressure of his grip. He felt lost, drowning in a sea of conflicting emotions, unable to find his way back to solid ground.
Simran took a breath, trying to regain her composure. “Okay, I’ll do one thing. I will ask Sameer to kiss me on the lips…” She paused, gauging Sidharth’s reaction, but his expression was unchanged. He was still lost in thoughts of Shehnaaz, oblivious to her words. It pained Simran to realize that he didn’t even hear her properly.
Wiping away the tears that threatened to spill, she pressed on, her voice trembling slightly, “or rather I will ask him to kiss Shehnaaz on her lips…”
“Shut up, Simran! Stop speaking nonsense!” Sidharth barked, his voice rising in frustration. The very idea sent a wave of panic coursing through him. He couldn’t stand the thought of Sameer touching Shehnaaz in such a personal way.
Sidharth slammed his fist hard against the cement structure, feeling the sharp pain as blood began to ooze from the impact. But in that moment, he felt no pain. The physical hurt was nothing compared to the agony of hearing Simran’s words. That bastard Sameer could not kiss his Shehnaaz. No one was allowed to touch her. She was his. A fierce protectiveness surged within him. “I’ll rip that Sameer into pieces if he dares to touch Shehnaaz,” he thought, anger coursing through him like fire.
Simran took a deep breath, forcing herself to focus on the bleeding heart before her. She knew it was now or never; she had to make him understand today, no matter the cost.
“What happened, Sidharth? Why so angry? Did I say something wrong? They like each other, so obviously, they will get married, and after that…” Simran asked casually, trying to keep the mood light despite the tension hanging in the air.
“Will you just shut the hell up? She is mine, and no one can touch her!” Sidharth screamed, his voice raw with emotion. The weight of his anger became unbearable as he could no longer contain it. His eyes, once filled with warmth, were now clouded with rage, and for a brief moment, Simran felt a chill run down her spine at the intensity of his gaze. But she quickly steeled herself, refusing to back down.
Simran smirked widely, a knowing look on her face. The smile only fueled Sidharth’s fury, making him feel as though she was mocking his turmoil. He felt a deep urge to leave, to escape the suffocating atmosphere, but Simran pressed on.
“You feel pain when Shehnaaz feels pain, but you don’t love her,” she challenged, her tone piercing through his anger.
Sidharth turned away, grappling with the truth of her words. Deep down, he knew she was right. He couldn’t deny the connection he felt with Shehnaaz, the way his heart raced when she was near, the way his chest tightened at the thought of her with someone else. But admitting it felt like stepping off a cliff into the unknown, a leap he wasn’t sure he was ready to take.
“You cry when Shehnaaz cries, but you don’t love her…” Simran’s words hung in the air like a heavy weight, pressing down on Sidharth’s chest.
He shut his eyes tightly, desperately trying to keep the tears at bay. The last thing he wanted was to reveal the turmoil inside him, the bloodshot eyes betraying the pain he felt.
“You get possessive when someone comes closer to Shehnaaz, but you don’t love her…” Simran continued, her voice cutting through his defenses.
His heart raced painfully at the memory of the hug between Shehnaaz and Sameer. The sight had sent a shockwave through him, igniting a possessive fire that left him feeling raw and exposed.
“You just can’t stand the sight of someone touching Shehnaaz, but you don’t love her…” Each statement felt like a dagger, piercing deeper into his already fragile state. He clenched his bleeding hand, wanting to inflict pain upon himself as a distraction from the turmoil within.
“You go insane when Shehnaaz likes someone else, but you don’t love her…” The words echoed in his mind, twisting like a knife. The thought of her feelings for Sameer gnawed at him. How could she like him? She was his, wasn’t she? Since childhood, she had always belonged to him.
“Your heart flutters when Shehnaaz smiles, but you don’t love her…”
He remembered the way her smile could light up the darkest days, how it felt like sunshine pouring into his soul. It was a feeling he couldn’t ignore, no matter how hard he tried to push it aside.
“Your every sentence starts with Shehnaaz and ends with Shehnaaz, but you don’t love her…”
Sidharth’s mind was flooded with countless memories, moments shared with Simran when all he could talk about was Shehnaaz. “Shehnaaz aise hi… waisi hai… pagal hai… pyari hai… masoom hai…” The list was endless. It was as if she was a melody woven into the very fabric of his life, and now it was all unraveling before him.
“You love it when Shehnaaz looks at you. You hate it when Shehnaaz avoids you, but you don’t love her…”
As Simran’s words pierced through him, tears streamed down Sidharth’s face. Memories flooded back to him, vividly recalling the two years that felt like an eternity. Those years had been so painful, so hollow, when his Shehnaaz had turned her back on him and refused to even speak. The ache in his heart was almost unbearable, a constant reminder of how much he craved her presence. He remembered how desperately his eyes sought her gaze, how every corner of his heart longed to hear her nonstop chatter. Where had that lively chatterbox gone?
“Needles pass through your heart when Shehnaaz gives importance to someone else more than you, but you don’t love her…”
With each word, Sidharth felt a surge of anger welling up inside him. He stormed away, gripping the cold pillar for support as an unfamiliar restlessness washed over him. His body trembled under the weight of his emotions, caught between anger and vulnerability.
“Your heart craves Shehnaaz’s love. Your eyes crave Shehnaaz’s smile. Your ears crave Shehnaaz’s words. Your hands crave to hold Shehnaaz close, but you don’t love her…”
Sidharth squeezed his eyes shut, desperately trying to block out the storm of feelings that was spiraling out of control. He wanted nothing more than to silence Simran, to shut her up and deny her claims. But the truth was he couldn’t. He was unable to say a simple “No.” Why was it so hard? Why couldn’t he just admit the truth lurking in the depths of his heart? It felt like a battle raging inside him, a fierce struggle against the undeniable feelings he was too scared to confront. “Grhh… this is all so frustrating!” he thought, fighting against the turmoil within him.
“How much do you feel happy when you hug me close…” Simran trailed off deliberately..
“Not you…” Sidharth snapped instantly, his voice laced with defensiveness and pain.
Simran’s lips curved into a sad smile, her expression softening. She knew then that he had acknowledged it, even if just for a fleeting moment. For a second, she had imagined herself in Shehnaaz’s place, and his immediate response made her realize how deeply he cared.
But horror washed over Sidharth. What had he just said? Why had he instinctively thought of Shehnaaz instead of Simran? His heart had denied this truth, yet it couldn’t resist when Simran mentioned Shehnaaz’s name.
Does he…?
What?
NO…
This is crazy…
He didn’t lo—
Ugh, he didn’t lov—
Simran, with tears brimming in her eyes, allowed a soft smile to escape her lips. “And you say you don’t love her…”
Sidharth felt his entire world tremble at the weight of this realization. What was happening to him? The truth was hitting him hard, and it felt like a wave crashing over him, leaving him gasping for breath.
He fell to his knees, his restless eyes darting around as if searching for something he couldn’t quite articulate.
Simran, sensing his turmoil, placed her hand gently on his shoulder. “You want peace, right?”
“Yes…” he mumbled, his mind swirling in confusion and despair.
“Close your eyes.”
He obeyed, shutting his eyes tightly as he tried to center himself amidst the chaos of emotions swirling within him.
“Put your hand on your heart.”
He followed her instructions, resting his hand over his chest, feeling the erratic beat beneath his palm, a reminder of how alive he was, even in this moment of turmoil.
“And confess to yourself.. accept.. you love Shehnaaz.”
As Sidharth felt the warmth of his hand on his chest, a sudden wave of satisfaction surged through him. His heart, once a stormy sea, began to calm. The weight of his emotions lifted, replaced by a soothing warmth that spread through his body. It was as if a veil had been lifted, and clarity washed over him like a refreshing tide.
He smiled through his closed eyes, feeling an undeniable truth crystallize within him. “I love Shehnaaz…”
A moment passed…
Sidharth’s eyes flew open, and for the first time, he felt a profound sense of peace settle in his chest. The exhilaration of this realization bubbled up within him, a bright light dispelling the shadows that had clouded his heart for so long.
He couldn’t contain the smile that spread across his face, radiant and filled with newfound hope.
Turning to Simran, he felt a surge of joy and surprise wash over him, as if the very realization had taken his breath away. “I love Shehnaaz! Yes, I love my sana.. my naaz! She is mine! I love her so damn much!”
Simran smiled back, tears of both happiness and pain spilling down her cheeks as she absorbed the weight of his words.
Noticing the tears in her eyes, Sidharth instinctively pulled her into a hug, a wave of guilt washing over him. “I’m so sorry, Simran. Thank you so much. You’re a true friend… you’re a sweetheart.”
Simran returned the embrace, her heart swelling with a bittersweet mix of emotions. “You were such a dumb! How could you realize this so late?” Her voice was playful yet tinged with sincerity, a reminder that sometimes, love was simply blind to the truth.
In that moment, they held onto each other tightly, basking in the warmth of friendship and the clarity of newfound love, their misunderstandings melting away like ice in the sun.
—
Meanwhile, tears of both joy and sorrow welled up in Shehnaaz’s eyes as she turned away, feeling an unexpected heaviness in her chest. She had overheard Simran searching for Sidharth, and his sudden disappearance had puzzled her deeply. Almost frantic, she had left her meeting halfway, her heart racing with worry. But upon arriving, she was met with a sight that twisted her heart painfully—a hug between Sidharth and Simran, both radiating a happiness that seemed to engulf them.
A bittersweet smile broke through her tears as she observed them from a distance. Damn this heart. Wasn’t this what she wanted? Simran and Sidharth back together and happy? So why was her heart aching again? Ugh, I hate my heart sometimes, she thought, letting out a soft chuckle despite the heaviness weighing her down.
They were indeed made for each other. Sidharth had never been hers; she had come to realize that long ago, though it had taken her time to accept it fully. Clutching the shattered pieces of her broken heart, Shehnaaz turned to leave the scene, not wanting to intrude upon their moment of re-connection. She whispered a silent wish for their happiness, her heart aching but hopeful for the future as she walked away, determined to piece herself together once again.
___________
Sidharth stood up, and so did Simran, both smiling, but Sidharth’s happiness was electric, almost infectious. He couldn’t stop the grin that spread across his face, nor could he contain the sheer joy that seemed to fill every corner of his heart. For the first time in his life, he felt a profound sense of contentment, an overwhelming sense of peace. Shehnaaz… his Sana… he loved her. Damn, he loved his Sana. So much. He had been such a fool all along.
The restlessness of not having her near, the sharp sting of watching her avoid him, the painful jealousy when he saw her with someone else, the possessiveness that burned inside him—everything had led back to her. How could he have been so blind? So ignorant? All those emotions, all that turmoil, had always been about Shehnaaz. And now, realizing it, he felt free.
“I love my baby,” he whispered to himself, his voice soft but filled with conviction.
Overcome with happiness, Sidharth grabbed Simran by the hand and twirled her around with glee. “I love my Shehnaaz, Simran! I love her so much!”
Simran laughed, spinning in his grasp, her heart light as she shared in his joy. “You were such an idiot, Sidharth! How could you not realize it sooner?”
Sidharth nodded like a guilty child, his eyes shimmering with unshed tears. “I know… I wish I had realized it before. If I had… main kabhi Sana ko chhod kar nahi jaata. Those monsters, they wouldn’t have dared to touch her. That bastard Balraj…” His voice trailed off as a cold rage began to build in his chest.
The mere thought of Balraj brought a violent storm of anger and hatred surging through him, making his blood boil. His hands clenched into fists, and his veins pulsed visibly beneath his skin.
“I won’t leave him alive. He tried to touch my Sana. He made my baby cry. He hurt my Shehnaaz. I’ll tear him to pieces…” Sidharth growled, his voice laced with fury, his eyes darkening with a terrifying intensity.
Simran placed a calming hand on his arm, her voice steady but filled with understanding. “Calm down, Sid. You can deal with Balraj later. Right now, you need to confess to Shehnaaz. She needs you more than anything. I’ve seen the loneliness in her life. Only you can bring back the Shehnaaz you once knew.”
Sidharth froze, Simran’s words piercing through his anger. He was alarmed by how right she was. He couldn’t waste any more time. Shehnaaz needed him. And he would never let her get hurt again. Not now, not ever. “You’re right. I won’t let her suffer anymore. She’s mine, and no pain will ever touch her again. Not while I’m here.”
But then, a chilling thought struck him, halting his determination. He turned to Simran, his face suddenly clouded with doubt. “Does she… Does she love me?”
Sidharth’s mind raced with a thousand conflicting thoughts, a storm of emotions swirling inside him. She said she like Sameer… why did she say that? His heart twisted painfully. Does she really like him? No, that couldn’t be. She’s my baby… she’s mine. The idea of Shehnaaz liking someone else felt like a dagger to his chest. But then another terrifying thought gripped him—Does she love him? What if she does? What if, after she finds out how I feel, she doesn’t love me back?
His breath quickened as panic tightened around his heart. The thought of her rejecting him… it was unbearable. He would rather die a hundred times than hear those words from her. But deep down, a part of him rebelled against the fear. My Sana can’t reject me. She loves me, I know she does. She’s always cared for me, always looked out for me. But then, another wave of doubt crashed in—What if she cares because she sees me as her best friend?
Sidharth felt the words leave his mouth in a painful whisper, “Does she think of me only as a best friend?” The moment he said it, it felt like a stab in his heart, the very idea that she might not see him the way he saw her.
Simran, watching the turmoil on his face, closed her eyes in despair, feeling his pain. She wanted to shake him, to get him out of his self-inflicted torture.
“Sid, you can’t jump to conclusions like this. You’re tormenting yourself for no reason. As far as I know Shehnaaz, you are the most important person in her life. Right now, she needs you more than anything. Stop wasting time worrying about whether she loves you or not. You need to be with her, to show her that she’s not alone. She needs you to be there, not just as her support, but as her partner. You have to make her see that you’re not going anywhere, that she can trust you again.” Simran’s voice was calm but firm, hoping to bring him back to reality.
Sidharth looked at her, his eyes filled with pain. “I left her alone when she needed me the most. How could I be so heartless, so blind? She begged me not to go, and I still left her.” His voice cracked as the memories flooded in, overwhelming him. He remembered her tears, her desperate pleas. He remembered how he had turned his back on her, how he had gotten angry when all she wanted was for him to stay. The weight of his actions crushed him. How could I have done that to her? Why didn’t I realize it before? Why didn’t I die before causing her that much pain?
He stumbled back, lost in his guilt, nearly tripping over his own feet. His breathing became shallow, erratic, as if the very air had become too thick to inhale. “I was never there for her… I… I can’t…”
Simran reached out, trying to steady him, but he recoiled as if her touch burned. “I can’t leave her alone now… not even for a second,” he mumbled through the tears that spilled from his eyes, his voice raw with desperation.
Simran watched helplessly as Sidharth unraveled in front of her, consumed by his regret and fear. “I want my sana back..” he muttered, his voice breaking. “I want her right now.”
Simran was stunned by his frantic state, unsure of how to calm him. “Sid, relax, please. She’s fine! You need to calm down!” she urged, but her words didn’t reach him.
Sidharth’s eyes were wild, filled with a frenzied determination. “I need to see her. I can’t breathe without her. I have to see her.” His voice trembled as he began to pace back and forth, lost in his own mind, repeating her name like a mantra. “Meri baby… Sana is mine..”
Simran raised her voice, trying to snap him out of his panic. “Sid, stop! Calm down!” But it was no use.
“I’m coming, baby… I’m coming,” he whispered to himself, and without another word, he bolted from the terrace, running like a man possessed, desperate to find her.
Simran called after him, but Sidharth was gone, sprinting through the hallways, his heart pounding in his chest as if it would burst. He had to find her. Nothing else mattered. Shehnaaz needed him, and he would not fail her again.
Sidharth dashed down the stairs, his heart racing with panic. He barged into Shehnaaz’s room, but the sight of the empty space made his chest tighten with fear. *Where is she?* His mind raced, and without a moment’s pause, he rushed out, searching frantically through every corner of the upper floor. Each room he passed was void of her presence, and the absence of her laughter, her voice, made his desperation grow.
Sweat trickled down his forehead as his breaths became labored. He felt like he was suffocating in his worry. His feet barely touched the floor as he ran down the stairs again, this time heading straight for Dadi maa’s room. He threw the door open, his eyes wild with fear and his body trembling.
Dadi maa looked up, startled by his sudden entrance. “Sid bete… kya hua? Why are you so upset?” she asked, her voice full of concern.
Sidharth stood in front of her, breathless, tears pooling in his eyes. His throat felt tight, as if every breath he took without Shehnaaz was suffocating him. He needed her, and nothing else mattered. The words refused to come out of his mouth, but he tried to speak through his choked sobs.
“Dadi maa… wo… wo…” He struggled, his emotions crashing over him like waves.
Dadi maa, sensing his distress, immediately stood up and grabbed his shoulders. “Sid bete, boliye! kya huva aapko? Why are you so worried beta..? Just speak up, please!” she urged, shaking him gently, her heart pounding in fear for her grandson.
Sidharth couldn’t hold back anymore. He broke down, tears flowing like a child who had lost everything. He collapsed into Dadi maa’s arms, holding her tight as if he was holding on to his last shred of sanity. “Dadi maa… I love her… I love her so much. I’ve hurt her so much, and I don’t know what to do. I just need to see her… I can’t breathe without her… I need her, dadi maa…”
His voice cracked, filled with guilt and desperation. The regret of every harsh word, every moment he had let her down, crashed onto him all at once. He had to find her, to make things right.
Dadi maa held him close, her heart breaking for him, but before she could say anything, Sidharth pulled away. He wiped his tears hastily and ran out of the room again, his feet moving faster than his mind could think. He had to find Shehnaaz.
Left behind in shock, Dadi maa stood still for a moment, trying to process what had just happened. What was going on with Sidharth? Why had he broken down so suddenly? Her thoughts wandered to his earlier outburst with Simran. Was he regretting how he had treated her? Dadi maa sighed deeply, her heart heavy with worry. Why does he keep hurting the ones he loves so much? First Shehnaaz, and now Simran…
With a soft sigh, Dadi maa made her way to Simran’s room, her heart weighed down by concern for her troubled grandson.
_______________
Author’s Note
Hello, dear readers!
This chapter dives deep into Sidharth’s emotional turmoil, his realization of the depth of his feelings for Shehnaaz, and the overwhelming regret that comes with it. His frantic search for her reflects the intensity of his love, as well as his guilt for the way he’s treated her in the past. The conflict between his inner turmoil and his desperate need to make things right forms the core of this moment, showing a vulnerable, raw side of Sidharth.
Through this scene, I wanted to convey the depth of emotions that come with love and regret—how realization can hit like a storm, overwhelming the mind and heart. Sidharth’s desperation to find Shehnaaz, paired with his breakdown in front of Dadi maa, is a testament to the complexities of love, guilt, and redemption.
Thank you for continuing this journey with me, and I hope you feel Sidharth’s struggle just as deeply as I did while writing it. More to come as the story unravels!
Keep reading! Stay curious!
Also, stay tuned for Baarish, Bhula Dunga, Mora Piya, Beintehaa and Thodasa pyar which will be starting soon along with the rest of the stories. There’s so much more in store, and I can’t wait for you to dive into these new adventures.
Don’t forget to follow me on Wattpad, Instagram and Youtube for updates, behind-the-scenes content, and more. Your support on these platforms helps keep the creativity flowing.
With love and gratitude,
Shalaka
#novel #book #author #blogger #website #lovestory
Simran is a nice person
Sid ko atleast realise to hua idiot gadha hai wo ek dum
Nice hope ab sab thik hi yaha
💗💗🩷🩷🩷🩷💖💚💚💓💘💘💗🩷💖💚💓🤍🤎🤍💚💚🩷🩷💘❤️💘💗🩷💚💓🤍🤎
🩵🧡💙💙💞💛💜💝♥️🧡🩵💞💞💛💜💝♥️🧡🩵💙💞💛💜💜💝🙏♥️♥️♥️🙏
Awesome.. loved it
Hi hope dadi don¨t complicate the matter anymore thinking he is takling about simran 🙏🏼